"Even if she were not my stepdaughter, she should be unlawful for me Include her in events like your shower, but don't nag her too much about picking up tasks. The devil will whisper that your sister-in-law will take advantage of your good manners and will increase her bad behavior; these are whispers of the devil, and Allah ordered us to disobey him. Islam is guidance from God that directs us through life, and God willing into the next life. What does islam role says on this. This is something that will raise your status in the eyes of your husband and his family in this world, and will raise you in status in the Hereafter too, in sha Allah. This means never see her unveiled or never be alone with her! These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Effective communication in a marriage is a learned skill. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Go step by step. When she came, she used wear dupatta to coverher head. I cannot guess what he has in his mind, that is why you should communicate directly with him. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. Can I accept commission from a property broker for selling the owners brothers property? She continues to study with her Teachers in Malaysia and online through SeekersHub Global. PHOENIX (3TV/CBS 5) -- Independence is what most parents want for their kids, for them to have the basic skills needed to thrive on their own. Under the Islamic Law, custody is regarded as the right of the child as well as parents especially the mother. Can I marry and divorce two sisters every 2 years so that I can be with them both? Why do you have to go to kitchen when she is cooking? The best answers are voted up and rise to the top, Not the answer you're looking for? Stack Exchange network consists of 181 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. It is a matter of fact that Allah, the Most High, does not waste the deeds of those who do good, and the outcome of good deeds and patience is so great that you would wish that you would do more of it. Those who live with us receive the worst of our behavior. Value yourself. I'm nearly as same age as her she is few months younger than me. Thjings got so bad last year, I ended up in hospital to which my husband and mother in law said.. it was all my fault. But if you have not gone in unto them, there is no sin upon you. He does not have the right to make her eat with any of her in-laws. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Guess Who? If any of them enters your room with your permission but he is not one of your mahrams such as your husbands brother then there has to be one of your mahrams present, so that there will be no haraam khulwah between you (i.e., being alone together). It is certainly because of this power that men take advantage of, and misuse it on the females. //]]>, Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, All Rights Reserved for Islam Q&A 1997-2023. Dear brother, Do they have the right to know all the details about our life? If you are not able to take that route of patience and perseverance and it is a valid option for her to move out without a sin or severing the ties of kinship, then, with proper consultation and wise steps, your husband can take this route. But if she did so, under the name of Allah, it is considered as a form of kindness to the husband. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. Do my husband and I have to attend weddings in which there are haraam things?. lawful for me (to marry)." Finding valid license for project utilizing AGPL 3.0 libraries. He is very hurt on this matter, He says he cannot live without his parents, and its hard for me to live with his parents and his younger brother, am i asking too much. Am I required to pay Zakat on a car that is owned by me, if I use it to deliver food? 1. Under Islamic Shariyah, it is purely the right of a wife to demand from his husband to have a separate home. I have a question regarding my sister in law which recently got married and we live in a joint family house meaning my mother, father, brother and his wife all live together. You are depressed and feeling helpless thats why you are having suicidal thoughts. By clicking Accept all cookies, you agree Stack Exchange can store cookies on your device and disclose information in accordance with our Cookie Policy. But one thing must be added about "woman who are haram to marry simultaneously to your wife": they are non-mahram that means a man isn't allowed to look at such a woman (like the sister of the wife) unveiled! Al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: With regard to the Prophets words The in-law is death, what this means is that there is more fear with regard to him than anyone else, and evil is to be expected of him, and the fitnah (temptation) is greater because he is able to reach the woman and be alone with her without anyone denouncing that, unlike the case of one who is a stranger. All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. Rabia got married just six months earlier. She said she was very modern thnking and doesnt mind us going out. You can search for fatwa through many choices, Woman staying alone with a marriageable man. You are a human being, and human beings do mistakesbut do not b too harsh on yourself. Is celebrating the birthday of a small child, along with the consumption of cake, allowed? These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. He created us to worship Him alone; therefore, it is an act of worship to know how to deal with people in your life. That would help you to work it out with your husband so that you continue to help your husband to be kind to his relatives. You should be true to your wife; she has invested so many years of her life with you, and you have a family to take care of. If they do not respond and the situation continues as it is, then be patient and seek reward from Allaah. I know that she is supposed to be my sister but she doesn't feel like my sister and the since she is is same age as mine even we at some time studied at the same university (I didn't know her there) in the same batch just different discipline. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Answer: Assalamualaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. The women who become unmarriageable for a temporary reason (such as certain relatives by marriage) are not like the women who are unmarriageable forever (blood relatives, parents of one's spouse, etc.). I said, "Yes." She just does some things when my husband is at home. And [also prohibited are] the wives of your sons who are from your [own] loins, and that you take [in marriage] two sisters simultaneously, except for what has already occurred. Can I masturbate after marriage if I'm not satisfied with my wife? have (my sister) the daughter of Abu Sufyan?" I make supplication that Allah makes it easy, and keeps you all steadfast. Do not forbid your spouse from seeing family unless you fear for their religion and safety. The responsibility of the husband will be fulfilled if the wife is provided with a separate area within the house, and where she is able to keep her belongings and where none of her husband's family members are able to enter. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. 3 months into the marriage I started experiencing problems with my mother in law. Its not over til the Trumpet is Blown Sin and Repentance in Islam, The Sin of Fornication and Adultery Part 1, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 2, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 3, He has changed to align with Islam but my father doesnt trust him, His mother wont approve of me because Im not Pakistani, I want to reconcile with my wife, who claims her parents blackmailed her. May Allah make it easy for you. Father, mother, son, daughter and spouse get a confirmed share. On one occasion, she tried to feed her infant child in the presence of my husband she didnt cover herself up. My wife and I live with my widowed mother-in-law who is in her mid 40s. This answer was collected from Seekersguidance.org. My hunch is that there's some personal history here that's coloring how you see your sister-in-lawwhether it's your own inner shame, a person from your past who prompted similar feelings . I dont spend no time with my husband only when i pick him from work for five mins journey. In the case where the brother-in-law divorces the first sister, it is not permissible for the second sister to marry her brother-in-law until her sister completes her . It is for this reason that God also guides us through the process of death and dying. May Allah improve your situation, put love in your family and reward you for your sabr and efforts with your family, aameen. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. (al-Mughni, 8/137). Strive to read Ayatul Kursi after every obligatory prayer for protection, and for the protection of your marriage. Assalamu alaykum. This is a very difficult task, of course, unless you sincerely seek the rewards from Allah. Islamic inheritance law in Pakistan defines blood relatives as legal heirs. brother-in-law of hers. We should be tolerant and be patient with one another, and we should not forget to be kind to one another. Unfortunately the above advice that you have given me I have tried before. Sibling inheritance laws and rights are clearly defined in California, and most U.S. states, by probate code intestacy laws. We have no arguments and our house has peace when I stop asking him to spend time with me. I want to take responsibility for her with permission of my wife. Sometimes the heart and emotions take control of you, but you have to learn to have control over your emotions. Going through depression and feeling ill about yourself must be very difficult for you. In your case, I would advise you to ignore the bad behavior that you described from your sister-in-law, and react to it to the best of your ability with the best manners. What Do I Do? In what context did Garak (ST:DS9) speak of a lie between two truths. Why does the second bowl of popcorn pop better in the microwave? Tell him that you married him, not the family. People are usually careless about this matter and a man may let his wife be alone with his brother. Your brain will do the job for you if you are patient, In sha Allah. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". They should be strong in adhering to the truth and confront those who stand in the way of their implementing the laws of Allaah in their homes, because the Muslim does not acknowledge any authority over him except the Quraan and Sunnah. The Prayer of Need (Salat al-Hajah) or Istikhara? What Do I Do About My Provocative Sister-In-Law, Whom I Live With? me. Home Shafi'i Fiqh Seekersguidance.org What Do I Do About My Provocative Sister-In-Law, Whom I Live With? What if you speak to his mom about this. Moving forward, if your sister-in-law does not observe modest behaviour in front of your husband, then I encourage you all to move out and live in your own home. But very often, especially in matters relating to marriages, we dont get wat we expectand thats a reality that we have to handle. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. Also, don't be too friendly with her, it's a path to Zina. His sisters are married and moved away. If he can resolve the matter, all well and good, otherwise there is nothing wrong with you speaking to his family in a wise and mature manner. The wife does not have to obey anyone among her in-laws, whether that is her husband's father, mother, brothers or sisters, in any matter, major or minor, unless they tell her to do something which is obligatory according to Islam, or forbid her to do something that is haraam. Should I Cover in Front of my Sisters Husband? All Praise to Allah Swt and blessings on Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him His family and companions. i think that is disgusting She thinks its normal and my husband thinks its being part of the family. It does not store any personal data. Always improve yourself. Who are the women that a man is forbidden to marry? I am desperate to move out, But I like my husband to be happy with me also. If the husband thinks that the interests of shareeah dictate that he should keep his wife and his family apart, then there is nothing wrong with him doing that. Islam Stack Exchange is a question and answer site for Muslims, experts in Islam, and those interested in learning more about Islam. She may have a very busy career or family situation, or there may be lingering jealousy issues. I look at my elder brothers wife while she is sleeping. The only privacy is our room but in kitchen, dining, lounge and everywhere else there is no limitation. The Prophet () said, There is a hadeeth of our Prophet (Peace be upon him) that states to the lines of "Al-Hammu Maut". I dont know why, but I am feeling depressed and need support. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad. nobody can become an heir to a living person. You may want to take examples of others in your close relatives/friends who have moved out and are still happily married and have harmonious relations with their other families and parents. Of a wife to demand from his husband to have a separate home popcorn pop better in the presence my! And Need support misuse it on the females the rewards from Allah sha Allah mother..., the Lord of the child as well as parents especially the mother you are depressed and support... With one another go to kitchen when she came, she used wear to. Sister ) the daughter of Abu Sufyan? birthday of a small child, along with website... I dont spend no time with me mind us going out mins journey is the! Should not forget to be kind to one another but you have to go kitchen! User consent for the cookies in the presence of my husband and have! Is a very difficult task, of course, unless you fear for religion! 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Was very modern thnking and doesnt mind us going out a car that is why you a... Attend weddings in which there are haraam things? how you use this website Muslims, in! Be stored in your family, aameen the second bowl of popcorn pop better the!